shelly, most all widows remarried both men and women. men seem to remarry a lot faster than the women so that he would have a lady in the house to take care of the children. the john lott i found has a family headstone instead of the confederate headstone. ihope you have found him. maybe you could look into marking his grave with a headstone issued by the veterans administration. lots of folks on this site can help you with that if it turns out to be your ancester. thanks